Murphy's Laws of Comedy by Kaitlyn Grissom

MURPHY’S LAWS OF COMEDY

(Note: Murphy, Inc. is not responsible for any part of this article, which was written exclusively by sophomore editor
Kaitlyn Grissom. Murphy himself was unavailable for comment, due to the fact that something that could go wrong, did.)

1. If you make a joke and I don’t laugh, it’s because your joke wasn’t funny. If I make a joke and you don’t laugh, it’s because you have no sense of humor.

2. Any joke that mocks someone I don’t like is hilarious. Any joke that someone else makes to mock me is offensive and unacceptable.

3. If I don’t find it funny when someone rehashes an old, overdone joke, that joke is stupid. If I do find that old joke funny, it’s “classic”.

4. Me making fun of something is called “freedom of speech.” Other people making fun of me is called ... something else.

5. If you’re offended by a joke that I find funny, you need to lighten up and get a sense of humor.

6. When I say, “get a sense of humor,” I mean “get a sense of humor that’s similar to mine.”

7. Poop jokes aren’t funny.

8. ...Except when poop jokes are funny.